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Extension Communications
3614 Administrative Services Building
Ames, Iowa 50011-3614
(515) 294-9915

For Immediate Release

Contacts:
Lesia Oesterreich, Department of Human Development and Family Studies, 515-294-0363
Carol Ouverson, Extension Communication Systems, 515-294-9640

TALK TO KIDS ABOUT CLINTON - LEWINSKY CASE

AMES, Iowa--If any good can come from the President Clinton-Monica Lewinsky case, it may be that it offers families a chance to talk about values and beliefs, stated an Iowa State University Extension specialist in family life.

"Parents may well be horrified at the prospect of their 8-year-old asking questions about oral sex -- parents may not know how to respond," specialist Lesia Oesterreich stated. "Thinking ahead may help parents use their child's questions as a teachable moment rather than a time for stammering and turning red in the face."

First, whenever a scandal or media scare takes place, it is preferable that parents control the amount of information to which a child is exposed, Oesterreich said. "Knowledge about current events is fine, but children and most adults do not have the capacity to filter through the massive volume of media information now available in our society."

Ideally, parents should be attempting to monitor what their children see on TV, hear on the radio or read on the Internet, the specialist said. Parents can choose to turn off and tune out much of the negative information to which children are exposed. Oesterreich said it will not eliminate the problem of negative information overload, but it will greatly reduce the volume and impact of it.

She suggests not going into detail about the sexual events that took place, especially when talking with young children. For preteens and adolescents parents may want to offer short, to-the- point explanations about the sexual events.

"It also is OK not to talk about sexual aspects of the situation, especially for very young children,"the specialist said. "An appropriate response to a 4-year-old might be, 'That is not something I feel comfortable talking about right now with someone your age. I'm not sure I can explain it so that you could understand. What you do need to know is that people are upset with the president for a number of reasons."

A child's question could then be used as a teachable moment for issues such as truthfulness, responsiblility for personal behavior and use of critical thinking skills to evaluate news stories and school-yard talk. Oesterreich offers the following suggestions.

  • Young school-age children may ask about sex, but more likely will be interested in the issue of truthfulness -- something they deal with every day and to which they can relate. Parents might say that the president was accused of lying while under oath and might be impeached or fired from his job because of it. The lesson here is that telling the truth is important and that lying can have serious consequences.
  • Another lesson to learn is that the U.S. government has laws that were written for situations like this. If the president is impeached, then the vice president will become president and the government will continue to function.
  • Another issue is the difference between having sexual feelings and acting on those feelings. Related to this are the promises that married people make to each other.
  • Children also can learn to question what they hear or read and to consider the motives behind release of the information. This particular news event has led to much speculation and misinformation. One of the best guidelines a parent can give older children is to look for reliable sources of information that offer accurate facts rather than hype.

Also, "parents can offer the lesson that we are all imperfect people living in an imperfect world. Sometimes people, even very important people, can have behaviors that disappoint us. If we go looking for an example of poor behavior, we can always find it. But poor behavior on the part of others is not an excuse for us to do likewise. Instead, we should look for good deeds and behaviors that serve as positive examples for us," she said.

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