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Four critical elements shape your likeability factor: No. 1 Friendliness

Friendliness is…
your ability to communicate liking and openness to others.

Few of us are taught how to tune our personality, how to resonate with other people with civility. We may understand an engine needs all parts working to run well but we don’t have insight into the components of likeability. That we aren’t likeable when one or more parts are out of sync.

Friendliness is the most fundamental element of likeability.

It’s the threshold of likeability. You need to persuade others you represent warmth, comfort and safety when their guard asks ‘friend or foe’?
Reciprocation is one of the main reasons people like or dislike one another.
When you are friendly, others want to be with you and they want you to succeed.

If others don’t perceive you as friendly, then you aren’t friendly.

Friendliness is a communication event. Albert Mehrabian, a communications researcher at the University of California, Los Angeles, concludes 55 percent of the like/dislike cues people send are visual, mostly facial. 38 percent are transmitted via tone of voice. The remaining 7 percent are the actual words used. If you send mixed messages, people believe what they see or perceive more than what is said.

Signs of friendliness
Make eye contact and use your eyes to show emotion.
Use your eyebrows to show expression.
Keep your smile genuine and use it to greet others.
Hold your head up when you talk.
Maintain good posture.
Display openness with your body.
Add variety through modulations in your voice.

Try the Likeability Factor self assessment at http://www.timsanders.com/images-downloads/l-factor-self-assessment.pdf.
Post 4 inspired by ‘The Likeability Factor: How to Boost Your L-Factor and Achieve Your Life’s Dreams’ by Tim Sanders.


I will continue to work on my "Likeability Factors" as I believe them to be vitally important in the work place. A genuine smile and a caring expression are hard to fake - you can usually spot the phony ones immediately. I agree with the "signs of friendliness" listed above. All of them are excellent suggestions and will promote civility in the office, whenever they are used.