Ages & Stages

Stop Arguing It's hard to win when you start arguing with a teen. He or she can probably think of an answer for everything you say. Worst of all, arguing can lead to serious fights and family conflict. Instead:

• Let teens know you heard their point. (Dad: "Uh huh." "I heard you.")
• Use the words "regardless" or "nevertheless." (Dad: "Nevertheless, it's time for homework."
• Don't give in. If you give in after the child argues with you, you are teaching him or her to argue next time!
• Stay clear of a power struggle. Don't try to convince your teen you are right.
• Say, "I know you don't like it, but the answer is no."
• Say, "I'm not going to argue." And walk away.

Links
Managing Conflict with Teens (pdf)

Choosing Child Care
Finding quality, convenient and affordable care for your children is a challenge. Make wise decisions with these 5 steps:

• Do your homework. Know your options.
• Pick 3 and do a phone interview. Avoid busy times like arrival, departure and lunch.
• Visit. Expect a warm greeting, introductions, tour, explanation of fees & policies, and an invitation to stay awhile to see the routine and children playing.
• Check references!
• Decide which will best fit your family's needs OR decide to keep looking.

Links
Child Care Checklist for Parents (pdf)

Quality Time, Quality Books

Kids need to feel they contribute to the family's well being. Dads teach kids how to help in family duties and chores. Read these books together and do some things around the house!

Daddy Makes the Best Spaghetti
by Anna Grossnickle Hines, New York: Clarion Books, 1986.

In Daddy Makes the Best Spaghetti, the father is seen participating in non-traditional gender roles, which encourages and fosters a gender neutral task completion within household. This book also includes a mother who works outside the home.

Can I Help?
by Anne and Harlow Rockwell, New York: MacMillan Publishing Co., 1982.

Children should not and cannot always help out in the family roles for various reasons, namely for the safety of the young child. Can I Help? deals with the issue of children realizing that they are not yet ready to help in ALL aspects of family chores. This book also stresses the importance to ask for help when you need it, for we all could use a little help!

Me & My Dad Activities

• Prepare a meal together.
• Put on your old clothes and pick a grubby task to do together.
• Make a list of kid jobs and adult jobs that need to be done at your home.
• Teach your child a new task by 1) showing and telling how to do it, 2) by doing it yourself, 3) by letting them help, 4) by letting them try it by themselves with you nearby, 5) by letting them do it and then checking in with them after it is done.