Featured Fathers

I attribute wholeness in my life to my stepfather, David, Pops.

For me, happiness lives in harmony with the pain of having a biological father who chose to be a non-participant in the lives of my two sisters and me. Life has been a long journey through broken trust, anger, forgiveness, overcoming challenges, and arriving at peace.

Pops was a man I vowed to hate from the moment he began to date my mother, a man that just would not go away, even when we were mean to him! A man who was strict when we wanted leniency, a man who laughed when we wanted to make him blush, a man who wore baby bottle nipples and a pig snout to school on Halloween. He was a man that we found impossible to hate, no matter how hard we tried. Pops demonstrated unconditional love. He taught us that forgiveness of others meant liberation for our selves. He allowed us the time and space to work through the feelings that we harbored for our father so that we would not live a life filled with anger. His patience was never ending.

One of Pops greatest gifts is his ability to look for humor in all situations. Laughter is a cherished gift. Laughing at yourself is an important quality to possess. Besides, laughter always feels good, so why not? By his example, we learned a few other lessons, as well - shoes made of duct tape are functional, slippers can be worn when you want to shop in comfort, rock hunting is an all day adventure, and campfires, hotdogs and marshmallows make most people happy. Pops lesson to us: the simple pleasures in life bring us the most joy, don’t cost much money, and must involve sharing time with other people.

In exchange for these gifts to my sisters, our children, and me, the greatest gift I can give to Pops, is to pass it on. This year, my two daughters, ages 10 & 7, and I married a wonderful man with a 13 year old son. I have chosen to conduct myself in my stepfather's image, as I move forward in my new role as a stepmother. I am comfortable knowing that I can enrich my stepson's life in the way that Pops enriched my life.

Thank you, Mom. You were smart to bring this incredibly wonderful man into our lives! --Alison